waiting for inspiration

My, my, my… where to begin- do I just spill my guts or what?

boys:
Redhead- we are through- hes in love with the other girl, not that big a deal. But of course he doesn’t tell me about the love part till post-sleepover. So I basically got ‘just got laid’ brag rights out of it, hehe uhh whatever I’m so immature sometimes.

I had a winter fling while home- he is odd. The main odd thing is he really liked me. That never happens, I always feel boys are always lukewarm. But there were also plenty of other things. Unfortunately I was about half as interested in him as he was in me, but he was around so we hung out a lot. We still talk now that im back at school. I’m leading him on, its horrible but I like to be liked.

I like a guy in my one of my classes. I was sly and got him to come out to the bar along with some other guys in my class. I also invited him to my party- I hope he comes. I don’t like it though, im always so suave around guys im only moderately into aka redhead- I was totally in control. But this guy, I feel like a blubbering fool.

My break:
My friends are fucked, it was weird, I read and slept and got together with old friends and it was quiet and I read some more. I hung out with dad and mom which was nice.

Back to school:
I like my classes kinda, im in this ridiculous music one: 2.5 hours of just listening to classical or art music, not that bad, I just kinda read for other classes and played on the internet. I’m having some problems that are pissing me off with something I volunteered to so and its such a hassle and so much responsibility and bull shit I REGRET it so much.
But being back with my roomie is great, because im having times when I feel really social and other times when I just wanna sit on the couch for hours. I’m attempting to stop throwing up, and I haven’t since I’ve been back a school. Today was kinda hard though. But its basically over. Yay.

New years resolutions:
I’m trying to be better an not slip back into old habits with food. And I haven’t yet which is great :-) I’m also doing yoga, and my neck is fine, to bad the test results brought up some other concerns.

Well I must be off HUGE party tonight and its all for me because I’m getting old!